March 27, 2015

1. I forget what it’s like to sit on a couch that doesn’t smell like regurgitated breast milk.
2. I forget not to run my fingers through my hair after I’ve changed a diaper.
3. I forget the rear-view mirror is used to see traffic behind the car.
4. I forget that the baby can now leave the room.
5. I forget to read the weekly to see what cool bands are playing.
6. I forget that we cosleep with a baby, but am reminded when, during sex, a 20 pound troll doll bounces across the mattress.
7. I forget that I used to make fun of people who didn’t go to parties because they had kids.
8. I forget what it’s like to have domain over my own body as my nostrils are regularly penetrated by tiny little fingers.
9. I forget that dust bunnies appear to be edible treats to rug rats.
10. I forget that there are things to do when I’m looking at her. Like breathe.